The Baron Files
It All Changes In A Blink

Missed me? Really? Well ain’t that a chomp to the old grilled ass steak. Your pugilistic purveyor of protein powder has been as busy as a bug in a bull’s ass. Life is just not meant to be a simple place. Face forward true believers…on with the friggin’ show!

Part of what sent me to my fortress of solitude has been fear. The people watching me have been much more aggressive and threatening with their methods. Trust me when I say what you saw with the van and at the coffee shop is just the tip of the iceberg. Strange clicking sounds on my phone, smudge marks on my car windows, emails that appear, disappear, and then reappear with the content slightly changed. It is as if ever aspect of my life has been infiltrated. I haven’t received a single piece of mail in 10 days. Most of my friends have stopped calling me; people go out of their way to avoid me on the street. Why? Who got to the people close to me? This whole problem goes so much deeper. Where do I begin? Where does it end? Will it end me? I don’t know, and for the first time in a long fu@king time I feel like cattle being herded towards something sinister. I really don’t know what to do.

To my friends and believers that make up the PIE Community: I need to tell you the truth. The JUMP is so much more than a theory. You really have no idea what Hector & I are really onto. It is the future, it is the past, it is balance, it is chaos, and it is coming. We can only ride the tide and hope for the best. I can feel the pressure behind my eyes. It is almost upon us.

If any member of the PIE Community is in San Francisco, reach out to me via email. I need to meet with one of you face-to-face…and soon. There are so many things that need to be told. I don’t know how much longer I have but I won’t go out without a fight!!!!


Posted on 2009-04-09 @

Hector's Journal We're a Happy Family

Remember our friend Bike “Coward” Riley? Well as some of my mountain biking friends have pointed out, the trail in the video looks local. I’ve been more of a street bike person myself (I ride an 88 Davidson frame with updated parts but I kept the suicide shifters) but I think I can find it.

How did I convince Baron to give up climate control? I told him it would be good exercise. As you know we’ve been trying to stay out of the office for various reasons, everyone and their mother seems to know where our secret headquarters is and it stinks of mold (the mighty Baron rude is to cheap to spring for a dehumidifier). Now it looks like coffee shops are off the list too. So back to nature it is.

Baron packed about 12 tins of meat, four pairs of chicken breasts, a case of Muscle Milk and five jugs of water. Dude doesn’t understand that we’re only be hiking for an hour, you’d think we were climbing mount Kilimanjaro they way he packs So while he was looking for lost love on Craigslist, I quietly unpacked everything.

Our crack team of investigators pulled the Rubaiyat from our screensaver gift. Great job guys, now all we have to do is figure out what the has to do with Within you Without you and I am the Door. I thin you’ll agree someone is trying to send the PIE slices a message .

Wish me luck, I’m going into the woods with Baron Rude. I’m going try and wait until we’re at least 20 minutes in before I make my first Deliverance joke. 

Posted on 2009-04-09 @